FMyLife Monday

So, as a way to throw a little humor into the lives of my readers, I have decided to make Mondays "FMyLife Mondays." Using the website, fmylife.com, I will be posting my favorite fmylife stories on here for all to enjoy!

Today, I finally got my yearbook for senior year in high school. I started what everyone does, which is count how many times I appear in the yearbook. I stopped when I found a prominent photo of me, picking my nose in class. FML

Today, I grabbed a t-shirt from a basket of clean laundry. It felt quite damp. Later that day I mentioned it to my mum. She says, 'I forgot to tell you the cat has taken to urinating on the laundry when hes mad'. I wore that t-shirt all day, not even noticing I smelt like cat pee. FML

Today, My 5 year old sister informed me she had left me a present in my bed. She had tied a ribbon around a dead rat's neck and propped it up on my pillow. The label says his name was Bert. FML

Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML

Today, I was looking through my high school yearbook. I found a picture of myself and a couple of my friends at our senior prom. The caption gave the names of all my friends, their dates who didn't attend our school, and listed me only as "guest." FML

Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML

These were the best I could do today. Stay tuned for next week's edition of "FMyLife Mondays"!